'Tis the season

Christmas is behind us and New Year's is straight ahead. I usually don't particularly like Christmas (nor birthdays, Valentine's Day, etc) as it feels very artificial to play peace and merry just because it happens to be a certain date. Over the last few years however, I have noticed that some people don't need to play peace and merry, and I suppose that does add an extra touch to the whole event.

Back when my parents were still enjoying wedded unbliss, Christmas Eve was traditionally spent at home with us four + my mother's mother, who was at that time a nearly catatonic, whale-sized wreck. Since her soon-to-be-ex-husband was usually galavanting around with one of his mistresses and / or their daughters, I suppose my parents felt it was the polite thing to do. When we were younger my mother would serve something very classic, and in later years, we would fondue (also not a great sign of originality on our parts, but nonetheless tasty). I can't say I remember very much of these events. We always had a big tree, that I know, and there would be a Christmas stable under it, because it ought to be, regardless of the fact that none of us are even a little bit catholic, and there would always be presents of course. I know my mother would usually buy my brother a book, which he would never read and always ended up in my hands. My father would always buy me something 'hands-on' like lego, or a building set, which I could never figure out (yes, I'm so damn clumsy and impractical, I can't even build a lego airplane) and would always end up in my brother's hands.

Christmas Day would be spent at my father's parents'. There, the Vervloets would congregate and eat rabbit (the kids got wild cherries and meatballs) and the night would invariably end with my grandfather puking his alcohol out. Later, when my grandmother became a bit on the worn-out side, the whole celebration was moved to my aunt's house, but it basically stayed the same. The main problem here was that most of our family members never quite liked each other. My grandmother fiercely hated my mother, and that sentiment was mutual. My mother furthermore detested most of her family-in-law (up to the point of being physically nauseated by one of my uncles). Luckily she is the queen of smiling politely.

Not that the Vervloets themselves were very fond of each other. One of my aunts was actively hated by all of her siblings, probably because she spent most of her waking moments thinking of ways to make them miserable. My grandmother was always nice to me though, but for some reason she never liked my brother. Not really sure why, he was nice enough when he was little. I think. He never got as much money as the other grandkids anyways and she rarely required about his well-being. Maybe she didn't like blondes. My nephew and me are the same age, and for some reason our mothers would always put us in direct competition. He actually has the name my mother picked for me. She was pregnant at the same time as her sister-in-law, and when she gave birth first, she named him that way, supposedly just to spite my mother. Christmas was therefore always a parade of : my son achieved this, and mine that, and he did thus and blablabla. I don't know if our mother's only somewhat hidden hostility had something to do with it, but I never really got along with my nephew. Personally, I believe that's because he's an f-ing moron, but my memory could be a little tainted :p

Suffice to say I do not have the hightest opinion of Christmases and family get-togethers. However, this year was rather nice. It was just my mother and her bf, his mother, my grandmother, my brother and Tim, and everyone got along splendidly (even my mother and her sort-of-mother-in-law, who she usually doesn't match with, she really has the mother-in-law syndrome) and my brother was friendly as well, which was a first. Christmas day I spent at my 'family-in-law' and that was nice too. They actually enjoy getting together, which makes it a lot more agreeable :) A couple more years of this, and I'll be ho-ho-ho'ing by December (that sounds so wrong, doesn't it?)

Still, I will never understand why people seem to think you HAVE to get the family together for Christmas. Sure, it's nice when you like your family, but when they are the people you avoid as much as possible during the year, then WHY on earth invite them over for a night of perfunctory niceties and inane chatter? Is there some evolutionary explanation for this? Is it because people are afraid of being branded as 'naughty' if they choose not to see their family on Christmas? Are they just f-ing stupid? Or is it maybe because... well, the IDEA of a family to go home to is nice?