All that you can't leave behind even though it's bad for you

Deemer / If I had my way I'd crush your face in the door. zegt:
I think its really réally weird that you read hi at like 7-8
Endless Audacity *Your mama's so fat when her beeper goes off, people think she's backing up* zegt:
my dad read him
Endless Audacity *Your mama's so fat when her beeper goes off, people think she's backing up* zegt:
and my parents always tended to forget I was only 7
Endless Audacity *Your mama's so fat when her beeper goes off, people think she's backing up* zegt:
besides, as long as I was quietly reading, it was all good
Endless Audacity *Your mama's so fat when her beeper goes off, people think she's backing up* zegt:
some trauma aside

Rens has been asking for an update and I can't refuse him anything so here goes.

Camp was great. It was exhausting, it was stressful, it was unforgettable and I'm so glad I did it. I'm not going to divulge into details, but really, I felt for the first time in a while that I was doing something worthwhile.

Me and Lien also shared 'Dumbest camp moment' , with her running into the side of a door and me falling off a stage during a fit of laughter. We were of course both parodied at the free podium and I feel certain we will be reminded of it for years to come.

Anyways, I laughed a lot, and had such a good time, I'd forgotten how nice it could feel to just laugh and act like an idiot. I didn't have any break down moments though. No crying. I kind of wished I did, I think a good cry would release a lot of stuff, but I'm not the kind that easily cries.

Despite the fact that I had known all the other camp-guidance-people (I don't know the word, okay) for years, I was really surprised by all of them. Some of them I even will really miss hanging out with. Bert, Siska, Vlien, Tom and of course Anja come to mind, and I loved talking to Pieter, which is strange, because I've known him since forever, and we never really talked before.

After camp, I had to go straight to work, which was less fun, but it was very calm. Tuesday and wednesday I had the day off, so I went out for drink with Kevin and Kenneth and we ran into Janti, which was nice, he's still a bitch though :)

In the morning, Kenneth had to go to work, and Kevin and me went out for breakfast and it was one of the funnest mornings in a long while. I've read somewhere that I am at the age where you create the friendships that will be the most lasting and important in your life. Maybe that's true, but I've known Kevin and Kenneth since I was 19 and I do believe we will be friends for a long time to come. I hope so anyhow. Same goes for Karo, who I have seen very little of the last 6 months, but it doesn't seem to affect how we feel about each other. Tim is an example of someone it took me a long time to be friends with (not that I ever disliked him, we just didn't seem to click right away), but now I can't really imagine not having him around. At camp he was his usual supportive self, and he really made tough moments better.

Yes, I know, I'm rambling. There's so much I'd like to say about camp, but I don't think I could say it all very well, and some things are just not to be blogged about.

Anywho, I also had mother's day lunch with my grandma, my mother, my brother and my two nieces. They've been around more lately, and it's nice. I've commented a lot on the fact that I don't really feel like I have a family, and it's nice to connect with them a little more. They're nice girls and you know, they are family, so I'm happy to see more of them.

My brother is apparantly leaving for 3 months or more, to work on one of those mining platforms in the ocean, so we won't be seeing him for a while. That'll be weird, not seeing him around. He also sort of urged me to go see my father, he says he changed, got off the alcohol and drugs, and that he's lonely. Maybe I even will, who knows. I'm nothing if not forgiving.

I had a long talk about forgiving and how far one should go with that with Sueann, and I realised that pretty soon I'll be leaving EV, and even sooner, she will have to leave EV. And I like Sueann a lot, I respect her, I appreciate her with her good and bad qualities, and I enjoy her company. Despite this, we never get together outside of EV, and that goes for a lot of people there. And soon, we will probably hardly ever see each other anymore, and that's a shame. I don't really have a point here either, just that I will miss Sueann :)

I might be leaving EV sooner than I expected anyway, in about 2 months, but I haven't really made a decision about it yet. A lot of people are leaving, for various reasons, and I doubt more and more if there is still a place for me there. I could go on, I'm pretty sure I'd get re-elected, even if that sounds pompeous, but I think it's true. I just don't know if I want to be.

I'm gonna stop rambling, can't imagine this being very interesting to anyone. Next time I'll post a story and mock Jessica, promise.