I am a Saint for semen

Deemer / Vows are spoken to be broken zegt:
..why do you want a shetland pony?
Endless Audacity *Little boys who aren't polite give the pro-choice movement a reason to exist* zegt:
I've always wanted one
Endless Audacity *Little boys who aren't polite give the pro-choice movement a reason to exist* zegt:
It's not even a joke
Deemer / Vows are spoken to be broken zegt:
Really? =]
Endless Audacity *Little boys who aren't polite give the pro-choice movement a reason to exist* zegt:
really
Endless Audacity *Little boys who aren't polite give the pro-choice movement a reason to exist* zegt:
why does no one ever believe that



I should update, or else I'll lose my whole rhytmn and updates will be lacking for months again. Unfortunately I have nothing to say, so I'm sort of thinking it up as I go along, which might not be the best idea since I am rather ill.

Or very ill. Which is typical because my two weeks vacation started today. My body fought all the kiddie germs and waited for the vacation to break down in a snotty, blubbering, coughing, feverish mess. Thanks a lot body, like it wasn't enough you decided to expand on me *kicks self*.

So I read "The World According to Garp", which you should all go get, now! But no one ever listens to me so screw you all and don't read it and I'll sit here like a crazy people and scream "You don't know what you are missing" and then hawk up half my longs. That'll show you, muahahahahaha.

Okay, I may possibly have overdosed on my Dafalgan a teensy bit.

So people at work think I'm weird, apparantly. I'm not sure why, since they haven't even been introduced to the things I think are weird about me. But they think I'm weird already, so in a couple of months they will probably think I'm certifiable. Which is by the way a really hard word to spell for me, I always get it wrong, so it might be wrong again now. Same with conundrum, it sounds great, but really, how the heck do you write it?

I don't think I'm that weird. When I look at the people around me, they are all more or less as strange as me. Although the only really weird one I can think of right now is Frank. And he might be hors categorie.

But I , and the people around me, do seem to tend to get (wow, verbapalooza) into odd situations. When I was 18, I became convinced that we were a television show, a bad one, with completely unbelievable storylines. I didn't just joke about it, I thoroughly believed it. I even wrote a sort of thesis about it to convince my friends. I managed to convince only one of them, but I suppose that's something. For the record, I don't think we're a television show anymore. Except sometimes, maybe, a little.

Accoring to Karo, it's strange that I get annoyed when there are numbers in my call register thing, and I always delete them as soon as I've received or made a call. Same for my internet history, I only go to sites via links or favourites, I cannot stand it when there are things in the bar itself. I just consider it a healthy cyber cleaning urge.

And Tim thinks it's weird that I always have to eat my vegetables and potatoes, before I eat my meat (with the obvious exceptions being sausage and chicken cubes). This does not apply to fries or rice, then the order doesn't matter. It's not even really compulsive, I CAN eat the meat first if someone points it out, I just don't do it out of my own will. I think it must be a 'eat your vegetables' thing from when I was a kid or something.

So, I'm not weird. I'm eccentric. And no more than Karo, Tim, or anyone else is. Well, maybe a little more than Kevin. Who thinks it's weird (or maybe that was Kenneth, who really shouldn't talk about weird) that I have a mild distastes for orgasms in porn. I have no objections to it in real life, I just do not feel the need to see it televised.

Also, poodles bother me. They're not really little dogs, but not really big either and what's with the hair? They upset me, creepy doglike-but-not-quite things they are.

Endless Audacity *Ziek* zegt:
that'll be some surprised poodle
Endless Audacity *Ziek* zegt:
what is it with me and insulting poodles?
Endless Audacity *Ziek* zegt:
Maybe they remind me of Jessica Simpson
Endless Audacity *Ziek* zegt:
or vice versa

But I like those sausage dogs, they just look so comical.

Speaking of looking comical, it's time for the Boy Toy of the Blog and a bunch of celebrities.

Boy Toy being this one, who's not exactly so hot. Although he does have something. Possible herpes. But he looks funny, tee hee.

An old picture, but it fits the weird hair thing: Christina Aguilera. Boy, I'd hate to be around her in an angora sweater.

Here is Courtney Cox - Arquette's boob popping out. Not so interesting, but I love the look on the kid's face. He's all "Yo fellas, you getting this? Come on, take a couple of pictures of these mammaries!"

Straight men getting drunk and snogging, a common occurence and I don't know a straight man who hasn't done it. Although, according to some theories by my gay friends, this just means I don't know any straight men. When celebrities do it, you sort of hope for Jake Gyllenhaal and Ryan Phillipe, but what do you get? Yeah, Tommy 'I am a wife beater and proud of it' Lee and Dave 'I married the other, slightly less popular Baywatch chick' Navarro. We are not turned on.

Speaking of the beaten wife, she really has been out and about a lot lately. And I now understand why she doesn't bother covering up her boobs: she has supernipples that refuse to be put out of sight. Even a bra and a sweater will not conceal them. So it makes sense that she pops out of her top every chance she gets. I wonder if her kids are as cool as the Arquette one with all those pictures.

Jessica Simpson had a birthday, which means she is one year closer to being old and ugly and out of the media and possibly hawking pillow cases or leg wax on the Home Shopping Channel, so congrats to you girl! Although I am puzzled at her posing for a non-existant photographer at the party... Luckily a papparazzo was there to capture Jessica standing around and striking poses.

For those who hate Kevin Federline, here's a game. It's dull and lame, but whatever.

And this is mildly amusing and greatly disturbing. If you're too damn poor to afford the real one, you can now hire this Paris Hilton look-alike to come to your parties. Really. To stand around, say something stupid, get drunk, pee in a corner and give herpes to your first born child and/or dog? The amusing bit is how she doesn't even look like Paris at all. She's just fake blond and fake tanned, and that's where the resemblance ends.

And in closing. Eva Longoria is the 'saucy Latina' from Desperate Housewives, who is considered very hot, although I always thought she was pretty, but nothing special. Eva was photographed without her make-up and yikes! Even I have less hair growing in my lip. So next time the ladies despair at not looking like the people on television, keep this in mind.